Saturday, May 06, 2006
Excuses, Excuses (Major Updating)
Excuses. That's what I have been giving myself for the past 2 or more weeks. Judging form the last time I blogged, it's been more than 2 weeks. More than 2 weeks' worth of excuses.
2 days before Tuesday, 25 April 2006:I went to our school's choir concert with Garene, Wendeline and Nigel. But before that, I had my hair
burnt cut.And might I add, it was F.U.G.L.Y. Not that I had great hair to begin with, but it was fuglier than usual. The concert, as expected, wasn't too bad, but I still stand by my opinion that last year's was better. And as with every performance, they sang "Seasons of Love"; and as with everytime they sing it, no one's capable of hitting the high high high high solo.
After it ended, unless you're a retard, you should have known what we did - we left. We left and took the MRT back to Bishan. But halfway through, being the escentric person I am, I had a very very VERY serious mood swing and every inch of me was filled with angst.
And the excuse of the day was: " I'm tired ". But I actually wasn't. I was pissed. But at what, I seriously have no idea and will probably never will.
1 day before Tuesday, 25 April 2006:Knowing full well that the mid-year examinations were dangerously around the corner, I had the nerves to still be playing games online.
And the excuse of the day was: " I still have time. I can start tomorrow since the major papers starts on Thursday. Besides, I need to destress. " From what? I have no idea, and never will.
Tuesday, 25 April 2006:I started studying for Social Studies, but only for one, ONE pathetic chapter.
And the excuse of the day was: " Don't worry. I still have time. Besides, I'm tired." Load of rubbish.
From Tuesday, 25 April 2006 onwards:I struggled. It was impossible to finish all the chapters in less than a day. Not only for Social Studies, but all my subjects. I struggled with all of them. From Social Studies to Chemistry to Math to Geography. Despite all these, despite knowing the how hard they were going to hit me, I still messed around. And at the end of it all, I know I'm screwed. Big time.
And the excuses for all those days were: " I'm too tired. I need to rest. I have studied enough and I'm sure they would come out for tomorrow. I need to turn on the computer to allow the downloads to complete." In actual fact, I was trying to escape my responsibilities. I did. And now I'm majorly screwed.
Friday, 5 April 2006:The end of the examinations. My friends and I, (Jill, Mike, Allison, Garene, Linda, Amelia, Wendeline and I) went to Pizza Hut, at Thompson Plaza, to celebrate the end of the abominations. From there, we decided to go to Garene's house for billard. But halfway through, I backed out. This time, I was, for once, really tired, so I chose to go home with the intention of taking a nap (which I didn't take thanks my inability to resist the temptations of online gaming) before going to the Saint Andrew Junior Colledge Concert Band's concert, which might I add, was way beyond what I expected. It was fabulous. Huiwen, Linda and I later went for supper, after the concert, at the coffee shop near by. Then it was back home we went. I had the intention to blog and do some updating, but no, I didn't.
And the excuse of the day was: "I'm too tired." I lied. I was just lazy. Instead of blogging, I was playing games online.Again.
Saturday, 6 April 2006, Today:I went for church sevice. Then the remaining youths went with Jo to the prata shop near NUS for dinner. The adults and the rest of the youths couldn't make it as they had to attend a dinner and a dance concert respectively. Form the prata shop, we decided to go for desert at this small shop near Michelle's house, which ironically, she didn't know of. Then it was home sweet home for all of us.
Back home, we (Jonadab, Linda, Vinson and myself) decided to play some Warcraft. Vinson really wanted to play a match of DOTA, but I was against it.
And the excuse of the day was: " I'm tired and bored of DOTA." In actual fact, I was just being a sore loser. I didn't want to play mainly because I suck at it. And I realise how self-centred I am.
Excuses, excuses. Excuses seemingly dominate my life. But this is an excuse in itself. I dominate my own life. I myself control what I do with my life. I choose what I want to do and the paths I want to take. Excuses don't rule me. Excuses are just devices I come up with to escape from responsibilities.
Excuses, excuses - fragments of the part of us that wants to escape. Do you rlue your life? Or do excuses do? The part that faces reality? Or the part that runs?
2:37 am