Wednesday, March 21, 2007
With practically all the free time in the world, there's well, a lot of free time. Free time for playing computer games, free time for loafting around, free time for sleeping till 3 in the afternoon, free time for watching anime, free time for thinking, "Wow! I sure do have a lot of free time" and lastly but most importantly, free time for thinking. No, not just about how much free time I have in my hands but of other matters as well, matters that, well, matter.
Oh the puns. It's puni-tive really.
The friends that matter the most to me now are all stuck in a transitory phrase, just a I am, much to my, and perhaps, their distress as well. It is afterall, a period of change, and no one is ever comfortable with change. There may be those who would promptly reply "No, I love change. Change. It's good." The way I see it, you may react as such on the surface, but surely, there must be the slightest of apprehension no?
All of us have friends, close friends, best friends, friends that you never want to forget, friends that you wished you'll never have to lose, friends that you wish will stay by you forever, to a extent that sometimes you wished you never had them to begin with, so that you will never have to come to such a point ever.
But alas. Time.
Time makes it so that things change. As infallible the rule "Time heals all wounds" is, it is beyond any doubt that it will change us, for we are but humans, and humans are never constant. One can proclaim to the seven seas that one will never forget but, surely, that doesn't equate to one staying the same.
It's akin to...A close, dead relative. A grandparent if you will. You may have been close to him/her when he/she was alive but now that he's/she's dead, naturally, you would find someone else and as time goes by, you find that this other person has in a sense, replaced your deceased grandparent. But you haven't forgotten your grandparent yet. Well it is a strange analogy, but it is the closest I can think of, followed by another one about cheesecakes and green tea ice-cream. But I do hope it got the point across.
The thing is that it is the truth, a sad truth, that as we move in, and eventually out, of this transitory phrase, Change will happen. Just as shit does. Yeah, no shit. No puns intended. You make not like it, you may resist but it WILL happen.
The very same thing I told May on Monday, "Someday, [he] will eventually replace me." There will be nothing I can do to stop it and I will be grieved, but it will happen. Not just May, to all my best friends, Jill, Linda, YuYan, Garene, Nathaniel, Amelia, Nigel, LiNing, Thomas, YongWen, Wendeline. I will eventually be replaced by someone else. Then I will be but a memory. Heck, it has already started yet try as I might, I cannot stop it from happening. I am not my friends as an apple is not a watermelon and I simply can't make things turn out the way I want them to.
Not just people. Environment changes. Your comfort zone can never be constant. It will change and as with humans, you cannot, try as you might, stop it. Unless you die, get cremated and put in a little urn in which your comfort zone shall remain the same for eternity, but all that's besides the point.
But there's solace in the fact that I may still be a memory.
Change. Time. Them both go very well together no? Time never operates alone. they're a pair. Nay, they're one. Time is in Change as Change is in Time. Without Time, there will never be Change and it is, too, a sad truth that it goes for the opposite as well.
In the end, it's but a matter of Time.
The greatest thing you'll ever learn, is to is just to love, and be loved in return.
-Nature Boy
1:36 am